2020 Reflections

We made it. It is the end of 2020. The Year like no other before it, for so many reasons. I’m sure I am not the only one carving out some to reflect and process what an unprecedented year this has been. I remember celebrating out with friends on New Year’s Eve this time last year. Everyone had a glass of champagne in hand, balloons dropped from up above and voices yelled the familiar “Happy New Year!” This year has an entirely different tone. Instead of feeling this renewed energy to bring into 2021, I feel such a mix of emotions. So much of this year has been about Loss for me and so many others.

I started this year of 2020 on a medical leave from my job that I had been working at for a year. For the first time in my life, I was fired. Job Loss. Through much reflection, I had come to realize that I no longer wanted to pursue being a mental health therapist. How could I be expected to hold my clients up, when I was having trouble holding myself up? You cannot pour from an empty cup.

Then, as we all know the pandemic hit us in March. We were unable to celebrate my Grandpa’s 92^nd birthday. Early April, my grandmother took a serious fall and was never able to recover. We said goodbye to her and then 5 weeks later, my grandfather followed. Through this terrible loss, I was able to find a new level of strength within myself. I feel a sense of peace knowing they are together and will help guide me through this life.

Fast forward two months…

August came, very aware of the dangers of Covid, I was taken down by something else. Neisseria Meningitidis. That’s the thing about having a weakened immune system, no matter how good you think you are doing physically, I constantly have this question in my head “What is the next challenge I will face, and when is it coming?” My doctors told me over and over how lucky I am. Just another few hours things could have been much worse.

I am STILL here. And so are YOU. Once again, I became instantly humbled, and one thing was very clear. Resilience. This became another word that I will use to describe this year. We are all faced with so much and yet we think at the time that we will never get through it.

The human Spirit is unbreakable. Yes, it’s true that time and time again we get knocked down and pieces of ourselves seem to fall away. Things may even seem beyond repair. I have learned to slow things down yet again, and focus inward to heal and acknowledge those parts of me that were lost. I pause and give us ALL credit for being resilient beyond measure in these uncertain times that we live in. Instead of tearing each other apart for our differences, why does it seem so damn hard to lift each other up when ALL of us have the common factor of struggle?

I think I can safely say that we all have another common factor… HOPE. Hope for Brighter days to come. Hope for a return to the Pre-Covid days. I also Hope for Health. For ALL of us.

Cheers & Love!

Sarah